PMT Etiquette
I often wonder what men actually think periods and PMT are. It seems to me that men think that it's just a bit of blood, nothing to worry about and there most certainly isn't any additional pain, and if there is, we really shouldn't complain (because, of course, if the tables were turned, they wouldn't complain, would they?!) And as for PMT - well, it just means the wife's a bit mardy, right? No matter what time of the month, if the lady's feeling down it must must must be PMT. There can be no other explanation, can there?? Well gents, I hope you're listening, you may well actually learn something! This is the best advice I could ever give someone dealing with a PMT-ridden girl-pal, exclusively on this here website (because nobody else will listen to me)Boyfriends:
1. We have stomach cramps. It's a fact. It has nothing to do with how much or how little we've eaten! And the more you deny how much pain we're in, the more we want to thump you in the stomach repeatedly to let you know.
2. Many of us also suffer from headaches. Don't repeatedly ask us if we've taken anything - of course we have, but it obviously didnt work. That goes for stomach aches too.
3. We get sore breasts - do not grope us.
4. We're sore generally - do not grope us. In fact, physically, leave us the fuck alone.
5. However, we are needy and emotional at this particular time more than ever, so for God's sake don't spend as much of your time as possible as far away as possible; now more than ever, we need love and care and attention. More than anything, attention!!
6. We can forgive you for the above if you happen to be in another country (or county even). We can't forgive you if we text you and you don't text back for a couple of days
7. WE NEED CHOCOLATE. NOW!!!!!
8. If I'm pissed off, it could quite possibly be because you have pissed me off. Not because I am premenstrual.
9. Additionaly, if an argument kicks off, do NOT put it down to PMT. These arguments will be our most honest and scathing, and though it might be hurtful, it's much better to get everything off our chests! Even you will agree to that, eventually....
10. And finally, a pearl of wisdom from my mum "You [men] should just accept that everything you do, and everything you say is wrong. Accept this, and you'll live happily in harmony with your woman." There you go.
It's important to note, by the way, that this is by no means aimed at Dave. He's guilty of a few of these things, but so is every other guy I've ever known. This was actually sparked by someone at work (see point 8) so don't think that this is a personal attack on anyone in particular! And it is meant in the most lighthearted of ways (though I'm only saying that cos I'm not premenstrual!)
Nonetheless, it's something we could all learn from. I honestly don't think guys understand enough, and since most guys say to me "I don't understand women, why do they have to be complex?" I just thought I'd give this particular subject a quick going over. Next time: Why women need to shop....
posted by Kim @ 9/12/2006 07:40:00 pm
6 Comments:
I was married to a woman for sixteen years who sounds a lot like you. I was expected to feel, care, empathise, comiserate, understand, cater to, and worry about her all the time. Our entire life revolved around that period of hers. Her cycle ruled. There was never any time for love making, oh no, never anything to please the man, though I wanted our love-making to all about her, and hoped there could be a little for me also. I wanted to please her, to make her happy, to excite her, and eroticize her, but no, that darned period was queen.
The woman I am with now does not make her period the master of her existence. I believe most women don't. Only a few. I feel bad for you to be so preoccupied with your burden.
Incidentally, to require a man to just shut up, and sit down is to give him every reason to leave you. Is that really the kind of man you want anyway? If you want a man to understand what you're going through, explain it to him. If he doesn't, or can't hear you, leave him, because he won't hear anything you say, especially if he isn't getting anything out of the relationship either.
I wish you some level of satisfaction with your life.
Glad to hear you are not bitter and twisted about your failed marriage.
Your second paragraph shows that you have learned nothing. Congratulations on finding a woman who shields you from the realities of life.
First of all, that anonymous one is my mum.
Second of all, you must have completely missed the bit in the middle that said, more or less, this is meant light-heartedly and as a joke!
And thirdly, uh, are you saying you didnt have a sex life because your ex-wife had a period once a month?? A period lasts about a week (in case you don't know...) so if she wasn't having sex with you the rest of the time, maybe it was a problem with you, not her cycle.
And most women do have periods and therefore do often have PMT, some more than others admittedly, but to make out that I'm in the minority.... wake up and meet some more women, man.
Moreover, you could try reading the blog as it's intended, instead of jumping on the "women who complain are feminists" bandwagon. And then think before write a pretty much pathetic reply.
tell you what, get some neurofen plus - that seems to fix everything :P
oh and... have you taken anything for the pain? :-p
You know the dont touch us bit, isnt it quit ironic that many women get more horny on their periods than normal? God is indeed an utter bastard!
rather you girls than me mate.
i know exactly where your coming from kim
Kim this blog could have been written especially for me - I'm going to print out a copy and give it to every guy I know!
Thanks for saving me the effort of repeating myself over and over again...
lol
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